I have wrestled with how to put into words the devastating news we received on Tuesday. I've wanted to share many times, but honestly couldn't bring myself to share. Friday we went through with the difficult decision to put our beloved puppy of 12 years to rest. She was suffering with end stage cancer and while the vet was able to give her some relief, it was temporary. We spent the last three days giving her the best three days of her life. It's a strange thing, losing an animal. It seems odd that someone that spends most of their days in the background of your life could be in the foreground of your grief. We come and go and she's alway just been there. But I realized as I talked with Bryan today that this is exactly why the pain is so gripping. Nala has always just been "there" for 12 years. But she's been there as a constant. 12 years of hellos and goodbyes. 12 years of quick pats and kisses. 12 years of our 13 year marriage. All of the years of nursing school. All of the years of our children being on this Earth. No matter how ever changing all aspects of our lives has been, Nala has been there through it all. When Bryan drove off with her today. Ezra cried out. In a way I've never heard pain before. She kept crying, "But Nala is my protector. Who will protect me? Who will keep me safe at night?" As I held her I realized she couldn't have put it better. Our Protector. Nala has protected us day after day, night after night. Physically as well as emotionally. She's been a constant not only for Bryan and I, but also for our children. She's never not been there when we needed someone to talk to that wouldn't talk back. Or just needed a hug of unconditional love. It was our turn to protect her today. And as much as this hurts. Man does it hurt. We owed it to her to let us end her Earthly burden of protecting our house. We love her more than words could ever say. And I only hope this pain will pass soon. There hasn't been a day since thatI haven't cried and wished desperately that she was here. And I only hope this pain will pass soon. 

Chase all those squirrels in Heaven, sweet girl.